From: Upper Management
RE: The Christmas Tree
As you may have noticed our usual pre-lit Christmas tree has not made an appearance this year...nor will it ever again. Instead a brand new one has taken it's place. This is sadly do to the fact that we as upper management, felt the old tree needed to be placed to the curb do to a series of unfortunate events. The first being it had obviously become a fire hazard with the growing number of lights that had been bitten, chewed and gnawed off over the last few years. Also, if you stood next to the old tree in just the right spot as a breeze passed through the room, our old tree gave off a scent from you trying to claim it as your own. Although faux trees don't have a scent, if it did I'm pretty sure we'd all prefer a pine scent to urine. And finally, the branches on the new one hang perfectly. They haven't been violated from a certain pug trying to pull them or climb up to sit on them.
So, pug we'd be ever so thankful this Christmas if you'd respect the tree and not give baby bro. Landry any ideas.
P.S. No, you will not be getting a Christmas bonus.
past memos to pug can be found here 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7 and 8}